When she was working Step Nine, Keri’s sponsor suggested she make amends to herself. Keri did so by writing a prayer that “lists positive characteristics that oppose my character defects . . . . By saying this prayer daily and out loud to my Higher Power, I am acting as if . . .”
John hated his grandmother for the way she treated him as a kid. And he ate over it. But by working Steps Eight and Nine and by doing a “forgiveness inventory,” he got to the bottom of it and was able to forgive. “This program is amazing,” he writes.
The list of amends to make in Step Nine may be long, but it is guaranteed to be finite. Even in a difficult Ninth Step, the promises still come true! “And,” this writer reports, ”I am able to stay abstinent . . . one day at a time!”
Sherril didn’t see why all the fuss about self-amends. Then one day, while they were doing laundry, her daughter remarked that Sherril’s underwear belonged in the trash.
At Step Nine, Fiona has to come to terms with apologizing to her mom. “Whether she apologizes is irrelevant,” she says. “I need to clear my side of the street.”
Alan’s grandmother helped raise him, but later, Alan couldn’t bring himself to visit her in the nursing home. Working Step Nine, found a way to make a living amends and find a new passion for public health.
“I need to forgive myself for my addiction,” says Anonymous. Thankfully, we can all share in this very powerful part of Step Nine.
Tina, a recovering compulsive overeater, and Gloria, a compulsive overeater and food addict, host this workshop on Step Nine: “Make direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.” They give specific examples to show what making amends can look like in different situations.
Jo used to steal food from the plates of hospital patients and eat their leftovers. Working the OA program, allowed him to come clean in Step Nine and find a new way of living.
Anonymous was a compulsive thief and a cheat. During his Step Nine, his sponsor made sure he did one thing each day. His Step work was so thorough, that his sponsor told him he didn’t have to go back to Step Nine.