But until we are ready to admit defeat, our abstinence will be on shaky ground.
My name is Maddie. I have been in OA and abstinent for one week. I am doing daily writing on Step One, and my sponsor suggested I send some of what I’ve written to Lifeline because no one wants to admit they are defeated or powerless.
It’s terrible to admit that we’ve acted in a way that has brainwashed us and led to a destructive obsession with food, so much so that only God can take it away from us.
However, once in recovery, we can see that this form of defeat is in fact surrender and that there is a way to become strong and free. We can see that this very act of surrender is the foundation with which we can build a better life.
But until we are ready to admit defeat, our abstinence will be on shaky ground; it has been proven over and over again.
At first, we may still be willing to fight our addiction and believe we can conquer it with our own willpower, even though the steady worsening of our addictive behaviors around food show us we are not winning the battle.
It is important to pass on the message of recovery, to be an example, not a preacher. To help not only those who are in total desperation—because they may be more likely to reach out and find help as their very last hope—but to also reach others who are seemingly “coping with life” yet are fully in the grip of their overeating disease. If the seed is planted, these people will often come back when the time is ripe.
The lengths we need to go to and the Steps we need to take may be simple but they are not always easy, and no one would want to take them if they didn’t have to. The key is each person who begins recovery needs to realize we do have to do these things in order to keep ourselves alive and have lives worth living.
—Maddie, United Kingdom
